WOW! It has been awhile!

For those who have checked this blog, it has been a year and a half since we posted anything. That's too long, but hopefully those interested found what was going on, on Facebook. Here is a brief update: We are living in Annapolis and loving it. I am finishing a masters in leadership, education and development at the University of Maryland. After I am finished with the masters, I will be working at the Naval Academy for a few years. My back is better, and I am just tracking its status with semi-annual to annual MRI's. Praise God! Meredith is still with Arbonne, is doing well and really loves it. She has been able to get involved with a Bible study and mom's group (MOPS) at our church. We really do love our church and the Sunday school group we have been able to be involved with. And Mattox, He is walking all over the place now, talking up a storm (mostly in his own language), and can say mama, dada, cheese, lights, ball, trees...I think that's about it. It blows my mind just how much he can understand. 

We are so thankful for where God has put us. He continually answers our prayers, and blesses us, even though we do not deserve it. If you have any thoughts as to how you can be good and follow all of the rules so that God will give you what you want, remember, that it is not our works that save us, nor is it what we do that is sufficient for 

us, it is only because of His grace that we are both saved and are alive. Easter is more than eggs, it is about the grace of God, and the truth of Christ's resurrection. We live (literally) because He is alive.

From Death to Life

It has been exactly one year from when I had surgery to remove the tumors that had regrown on my spine. Many things could have happened from that time, the most serious of which would have been death. Now one year later, Meredith and I have a new life in our family. At 3:10 AM on Tuesday morning, November 6th, Mattox Aaron McCaleb was born into the world, weighing 9 lbs 8 ounces and measuring twenty-two inches long. God has truly shown us that nothing is impossible, even when you are told that you probably will not be able to have children. Now we have a precious little boy who is a true testimony of God’s grace, strength, and touch. Words cannot express how Meredith and I feel right now, to know that the Author of Life has woven together this little boy, as a blessing to our family, and as a light for this world.

Regarding my wife Meredith, she is completely unbelievable! I had the utmost respect for her prior to this, but she completely surpassed any strength I have seen so far in my life. Her labor lasted around thirty-six hours, and she was pushing for nearly 3. Because she had a mild case of gestational diabetes, she had to be induced (gestational diabetes is probably why this boy was so big!). She is awesome and is such a great mother! The Lord truly is her strength!

Now for our boy, well we love him so much. He is truly precious, and has such a wonderful demeanor. Just looking at him makes us see how God truly has designed each one of us, to even the most minute detail. How wonderful it is to know that when a baby is born, he or she has everything already made even right down to their tiny fingernails and eyelashes. I know I am going to have to sleep more, but I love holding him.

God has turned what some see as a tragedy and has blessed us with this most precious gift of life. How similar this is to all our lives. As owners of sin (we are all born with it), we deserve death, both physically (which we all achieve someday) and spiritually. But God so loved us that he sent his one and only Son, that whosoever believes on Him, should not perish (spiritually) but have eternal life. If you seek Him, you will find Him. May you seek Him first.

Meeting Mom and Dad

Enjoying the Ride

Relaxing with Dad

It's About Time

This is simply amazing that I haven't given an update in almost a lifetime, so here goes. Right now I am 6 months out of radiation treatment. What am I on the all-too-familiar one-to-ten pain scale? Well, I ride pretty consistently around a 3 or 4. I am not in favor of taking pain meds because I have taken them for a while. However, the pain that I feel, seems to be strictly some nerve damage, probably some due to both surgeries, and the rest to radiation. The best part is that I believe the pain is slowly dissipating. I have been working out a lot and doing large amounts of physical therapy; and for the first time in a year I have been running. Last Friday I actually ran a mile! Praise God!

As for the Navy, I am currently in a somewhat medical limbo period before I can be cleared to return to submarines. All of this PT is aiding in improving my physical strength and reducing the nerve pain, both of which I would like to have occur prior to returning to duty. Both my neurosurgeon and oncologist today have recommended that I be allowed to return to full duty, so that is a huge step in obtaining a medical waiver from the Navy. I recently missed what would have been my last patrol (deployment), so if I were to obtain a waiver, I would have a strong chance of rolling into shore duty (don't go to sea for 2 years). Still, everything is up in the air, I could be disqualified for submarine duty, whereas we would probably transfer to another community in the Navy, or I could resume my professional soccer career at the ripe age of almost 27, with two spinal laminectimies and one ACL replacement under my belt. It could happen. Or maybe go back to school or do something else.

I believe that God does things for very specific reasons and at even more specific times. Of course, this is not a new idea because it is painted all throughout the Bible, and probably visible in your own life, but this whole bout with cancer and having to receive radiation treatment, which originally could have made me sterile, inspired my wife Meredith and I to face some tough issues--primarily trying to have children (we have always wanted them, but of course, not right now). Well let me tell you, it must have been time. Because come November, we will be having a little boy around! We are so excited for this awesome gift! It is even more exciting to think that what could have done serious damage to me and my family, God used to build our family. Why should we ever doubt? He knows the plans He has for us, to prosper and not to harm us, and to give us a hope and a future...and we will seek Him and find Him when we seek Him with all of our hearts. And we will find Him. Jeremiah 29:11-14.

I hope that you can see His timing. It's totally perfect, it's when we truly need it. Take hold. Genesis 45

Radiation

Well, here is a current update to let everyone know how things are going.

Last Wednesday, I started my radiation treatment. It wasn't quite like I thought it was going to be, but we are getting through it. I pictured a quick time/in-and-out-kind of thing. We actually thought the treatment was going to take place on Monday, but that turned out to be only a CAT-scan, feeding the anticipation. The first day took a while, I guess I should have expected that when the guy giving me the treatment told me that day would take longer than the rest. The reason being was that they had to take a few more films of me before getting started. I guess I couldn't blame them because if the radiation is off by a little bit, I could grow another liver or something--just kidding, but it could do some damage to something that didn't need to be damaged. Anyway, the procedure goes a little something like this: I lay on my back on this table, then I put my legs into these molds, and then I get strapped to the table by the plastic mask that I mentioned in a previous post. My head is held pretty tight to the table, so much so that I have some grid marks under my chin and on my nose. The radiation guys then adjust my body some and make some marks around the tattoos that I was given earlier in October. They then leave the room, and the lights go partially out. The robotic armature type device rotates around my horizontal body, and then this buzzing noise can be heard for a few seconds. I was told that this is when the actual radiation is beamed in. I don't think that I can feel anything while it is happening. I try to really focus when this happens to see if I can actually feel it, but then I am like, oh, I am just hungry, or this mask on my face is really, really tight, but I at least I can still breathe.

I am given some medication that helps with the nausea that people get when this area of the body gets radiated. Due to the location of the tumors, the radiation comes from the front, and is angled in at 3 places, instead of the 4 that I was previously told would happen. This is actually a blessing because my kidneys will receive a large amount less than there were originally going to receive.

After the first day's treatment, I was nauseous on the way home and was thankful that we had a plastic bag and some napkins in the car (so was Meredith--she was very strong). But after the first day of radiation, I have been taking more of the medication, and I haven't been nauseous since. The typical day of radiation is as follows: Meredith and I wake up and leave our house between 8:00 and 8:15. We drive to Tacoma while listening to music and cool books on CD. I then get treated around 9:30, and we leave shortly after 10:00. I don't really feel any of the effects until about an hour or hour and a half after the treatment. Then I am pretty wiped out, so I take a nap. When I wake up a couple of hours later, I am pretty much normal...And so starts another day. I can be honest and say that I am not so much looking forward to next week, but the treatments will start to seem faster because they no longer have to take the films before the treatment begins, so it will now seem like radiation-drive-through service. I am looking forward to it because my wife is there with me, and she is really encouraging me.

I am learning that things don't always have to seem great or I don't have to act like I or everything is perfect or that I am so joyous 24-7 (24 Season 5 is out though), but I (we) need to just go with it. God is so good. The fact that I am standing and walking is a testament to that. We take His gift of salvation for granted way too much, and some don't even see it, or haven't even opened it. God bless. Romans 6: 23

Give Thanks

"Do not worry about anything, but in everything, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the peace of God will guard your hearts and minds in Christ.: Philippians 4:6-7

There is a lot that we all have to be thankful for. Food on the table, roofs over our heads, clothes on our back, our families, and our health. After talking with some of my family on the phone, hearing their concern for my back and how scary the surgery was, I am thankful for my health right now. Thank you for your prayers too, for God has truly answered them. Give Him the glory.

On Tuesday, I got my stitches out. It was not as painful as I thought. Every morning when I wake up, my mobility increases. I am walking around, almost normally. I am still a little slow, and I need to be careful with what I lift. My left leg, which is what was hurting prior to surgery due to nerves being pressed by the tumors, still hurts some, but it is probably residual pain because of the nerves being inflamed.

Meredith and my parents have been wonderful taking care of me and helping me with everything. Sometimes they think they haven't helped enough because I have been able to move around so much and the recovery has been so fast. But they really have, it has been such a blessing for my parents to be here. And my wife is amazing. She has cooked such amazing food and has taken great care of me.

This recovery has literally been twice as fast as the surgery in 2003! God has done so much, He continues to prove He is the great physician. He leads me beside quiet waters. Psalm 23.

Be thankful for the grace, the forgiveness, the Salvation, the relationship from Christ.

Home Sweet Home

Well, our hospital stay is over! We were able to come home today, Tuesday, a couple of days earlier than I had expected based on my last surgery. God has totally increased the speed of this recovery. From the moment I was awake in ICU, I kept saying that, " I can't express how much better I feel than last time!" The post surgery pain and soreness has been nothing like my last surgery. Although last surgery was a little more invasive as far as the laminectomy goes, the doctors removed four tumors, one was not expected. All of them were very easily removed, and were "jelly-like" instead of hardened masses. A post surgery MRI showed that nearly 98% of the tumors were gone, the little that remained should easily be fought by the radiation (or the Lord could just take it out). I am able to walk around (very slowly and carefully), and I have seen an increase in my walking ability and a decrease in the pain I feel each day. The majority of the pain I am experiencing now has to do with the incision that was made for surgery. It is about 13 inches and goes well below the belt on the backside. My back muscles are somewhat in shock, which makes my back as stiff as a board, supreme posture.

The coolest thing happened today though. Even though the weather has been somewhat dreary, we still could view many mountains from my hospital room window. We were totally blessed with a seventh floor, window room, we wanted the jacuzzi, but it was taken. Today the clouds were pushed away and the sun was shining so bright through the window. What was even more amazing was Mt. Rainier was huge outside the window! What seemed to be small, cloud covered mountains the previous days, turned out to be the giant Mt. Rainier, snow-covered and awesome! It was God saying, that I was on the mountain top, and to remember that, no matter where I am.

Night Before Surgery

Everybody,
This comes to you the night before my surgery. All is well. My parents are in from Houston, and we all are staying on base about two minutes from the hospital. Today I went through the pre-op routine: blood drawn, anestesiologist, vital signs. We have had an awesome day, and everyone that we encountered was very nice.

Tomorrow, Thursday, at 0900 we return to the hospital for surgery. The exact length of the surgery is indeterminable and depends on how easy the tumors can be removed. The same surgery I had done three years ago lasted approx 9 hrs., so Meredith and my parents are in for a marathon. They will be in a waiting in a room, and the doctor will come out at parts during the surgery to give updates. Afterward, I will be in ICU for about 1-2 days, and they will be able to see me. Then I will head to the normal ward for about 5 more days.

Meredith and I cannot express how much we appreciate everything that y’all have done for us already. We have received encouraging phone calls and letters from so many people, and there are so many people literally around the world praying for us. God’s family is huge! We will definitely keep you posted either via phone, e-mail, or blog. God bless you all; we love you!

We leave you this: Jesus prayed in Gethsemane for God to take away what was about to happen to him, but he still did not want his will, but God’s will be done. More than once he prayed this. I am not sure if he immediately got his answer, but he was betrayed and ultimately turned over to be crucified immediately after he was done praying. Mark 14: 32-42.

We have all prayed for God to heal me, yet not our will but God’s be done. As we sleep tonight, we still do not know if I will have to endure this surgery and radiation, for with God all things are possible, the tumors may not even be there when they open me up. Not our will be done.

Love,
Jordan and Meredith
Matthew 6: 33